Monthly Archives: February 2004

Retreating

The weekend was good.  I need some time to work through all the stuff in my head.  The best part of the weekend was the time to talk.  And the deepening of friendships – real friendships. 

I always have trouble going to these events because I take along my preconceived ideas of what I want to happen.  So, I had been praying that I would hear what God had to say to me.  And this time I heard – some things anyway – things that I have been asking about for awhile.  So for me it was a good weekend because I took time to listen. 

And it is good how God sometimes gives suggestions for things that will enrich our experience with him.  I woke up on Friday with the idea in my head that I should set up a corner somewhere in the retreat centre for prayer.  Not being part of the organizing of the weekend, I called the proper person and she agreed that this would be a good thing to do.  So, I packed up some things to create a bit of a sacred space – music and candles and a notebook.  And that ended up being one of the special parts of the weekend.

And there were other highlights too – the safe trip up to the lake on a very snowy and slippery day, the horse and cutter rides arranged by the Pritchards, and the hike with Janet. 

I think I lost about a gallon of water on the hike – all into my clothes.  I think there was one point when Janet thought maybe she had led me out onto the ice to my death.  There was a snowmobile track to follow but it wasn’t hard packed so we would be walking along when all of a sudden one leg would drop down into the deep snow.  A bit exhausting but fairly hilarious.  If Janet had a video camera I am sure she would find a way to show you how gracefully I walked!!  But we made it back and I am still alive and not too stiff.

The pictures and more I will post here maybe tomorrow.  My daughter is home and she and “Dad” are working through her essay which is due this week so I don’t get priority on the computer to get my pictures posted.  And I simply need time to work through some of the stuff I  learned.

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Time …

I am entering into that time of the year that consists of taking kids to finals in different things.  Provincial soccer goes on the weekend of Mar 12 and is way down in Regina.  I do not enjoy having to travel for four hours to get there but it is one of those parenting things that have to be done.  I do like watching soccer so the whole weekend won’t be that bad.  Just I had planned to do another private day retreat that weekend and now will not be able to.  Oh well, I only have a daughter young enough to take places for so long so will maybe use that weekend to reconnect with some other people I know in Regina like my friends, Shannon and Todd and my cousin’s son, Chad.

 

April is going to be full of dance competitions.  Grace informed me that she should have her driver’s license by then and I could just let her take the car.  I don’t think so!!!  The kids Easter break there is a competition in North Battleford so she needs to be there Wednesday am early and Thursday pm late.  Not great for a 3 hour drive for a working mom.  I am hoping that her friend’s mom can take them but she also works.  The following weekend the competition is here in town and parents are expected to volunteer so my weekend will be busy again no traveling at least.  And I can share some of the volunteer spots with a friend so we can at least visit.  And then sometime there is a competition in Biggar that she will want to go to.  Grace is dancing a solo, a duet with her friend and then with the large group that she does lessons with.

 

And last night as we were looking at the upcoming months as an executive board of the church, and as we are entering into the Lenten season, I realized as I looked at my calendar that I have filled up every weekend till May with something.  Time simply passes too quickly.  It is hard to balance my need for quiet and solitude with my children’s need for activity.  But we muddle through somehow and before we know that time has passed and some other landmark time is almost here racing towards us.

 

Reminds me of the words of Chantal Kreviazuk’s song Time”

 

Time, where did you go?
Why did you leave me here alone?
Wait, don’t go so fast
I’m missing the moments as they pass
Now I’ve looked in the mirror and the worlds getting clearer
So wait for me this time

 

And this weekend is set aside in my time for a women’s retreat.  So I won’t be putting anything up here on the blog.  I’ll be out in the wilds of northern Saskatchewan with a bunch of women worshipping God.  Talk to you all Monday and maybe will have some  pictures of wild Saskatchewan women to show.

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A Little Calcium for the … Egg Shells

As I am getting ready to return to the Congo for my first time since we had to evacuate in 1991, I am remembering.  Some of the memories are funny, some sad, some just, well, remembrances.  Over the next few months till I go I will share some of the memories.  Not every day but maybe once in awhile.  So here goes…

 

A Little Calcium for the … Egg Shells

 

Songo and I had worked together for a number of years.  Because I had taught him dentistry, we were pretty close in how we diagnosed dental disease a must for carrying out a WHO (World Health Organization) survey.  We had been in the village for about three days and since the survey for the WHO study was pretty much finished, we thanked the village by attending to some of the communities dental needs.  This meant extractions since we were working under the trees, in the open air with the sun for light. 

 

Songo was my first real dental student.  He finished secondary school but failed to pass the difficult state exams and did not have the financial resources to either go back and repeat another year of school, pay to take the exams again or bribe anyone to improve his marks.  So as many guys in his situation, he had begun to teach school himself because teachers were always in demand.   I had asked around about a promising new grad who might be interested in learning dentistry by studying and by apprenticeship.  He had been interested and over the years as we studied and learned together, I passed on to him all I ever knew.  And he in turn taught me some valuable lessons mostly about patience and tact and trust.  He was a God send.

 

Extracting teeth has a range of difficulty from very simple to extremely hard.  Most require a bit of effort and a lot of technique. Working in a place without access to x-rays can result in some surprises but most of the time you develop a feel for the tooth and sense when it is going to move or resist all efforts to get it out.  So a tooth that resisted all our efforts to get it to move with an elevator would most likely get sent away to the hospital where we would have more tools to attack it with.

 

So Songo and I lined up our patients and began to work there in our portable chairs with our boiling pot of water for sterilization in between.  Natural lighting, natural air conditioning and free entertainment the rest of the village, cats, dogs, goats and chickens watched and cheered on the poor patients. 

 

Now we know that calcium is necessary for strong bones and teeth and egg shells.  In the center of the Congo far from pulverized seashells and other sources of the mineral, one collects and dries the old shells from the eggs and feeds them back to the flock.  And I am sure that chickens pick up the odd bone that has been carelessly left uneaten by a human.  On this particular day, a new source of calcium showed up teeth. 

 

As I proceeded to lever the tooth of one patient from side to side, the root suddenly let go.  The tooth shot out of my forceps, flew through the air and almost landed on the ground among the crowd.  Almost.  But it never hit the ground.  A scrawny chicken looking for that coveted bit of calcium must have been eyeing what we were up to.  It caught that tooth in mid air and, as fast as it had reacted to catch it, disappeared into the grass surrounding the village.  Now that to me is an amazing bit of recycling!

 

 

 

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Wrapping things up

Today was a good day to finish off some things.  The TV thing is done and out of the way.  I think it went well.  The kids were getting into it by the end.  Sandra, the interviewer, said she would like to get a 30 minute documentary out of it – if her producer agrees.  We’ll see, I guess.  At least it doesn’t sound like we were too boring.  It was different playing for worship with a camera and sound pick up in my face.

I finished the toque I’ve been knitting for David.  I would like to make a matching one for Keiran but to be realistic – it would get done just in time for summer.  So I will start one for a two year old head and he should be able to wear it next winter.

So speaking of next winter – the weather has been nice enough that this spring may actually be on it’s way.  Also being realistic – we still are likely to have some winter surprises left for us yet.

And I think our year end stuff is done at work.  So I will look at it tomorrow and then start all the stuff that comes with getting ready for the taxes!  Oh joy! 

Tonight was a fun evening – jamming with the worship crew.  Women’s retreat this weekend will have the female half out of the picture as far as the worship team goes. But we had fun tonight just playing, at least I did.  I always feel like the slowest one on the scene.  Sometimes it is really hard to hear the piano as it picks up and carries the melody.  It is easy if there is someone leading the singing, since I can follow that and usually catch the timing.  But tonight was good for me – just trying to hear the music and play.  I need this kind of practice to get my ear attuned to the others.  Then I can go home and practice and practice till the notes come together – especially for songs with three or more flats or sharps!

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How Bizarre

Friday was just another of our days in the operating room.  But that day it all began to get to me.

 

Sometimes being a dentist and caring is an absurdity.  Bizarre that if I don’t cause some pain there is no way to help things get better.  Cynicism is hard to avoid.  Last week, I think I either cared too much and started to despair or I was extremely cynical I’m not sure which.

 

By the end of the day on Friday I was feeling absolutely drained, pessimistic and was kind of losing hope that I could make any difference in kids lives.  The morning in the OR really got to me.  Usually, I feel fairly good about getting a lot of work done on a child that really needs it.  But Friday, I just felt tired and a lot like my efforts to accomplish something were futile.  The whole week was filled with little hurting kids and they just seem to keep on coming!

 

First case: sixteen teeth…..too many to need out at three years old.    She really was a little sweetie.  Cleft lip and palate, tiny little thing. 

 

Second case:  nine permanent teeth …still way too many and three of them front teeth.  And he was not cute or nice.  Probably never will be.  He awoke from the anesthetic screaming, kicking and fighting to keep his head off the pillow.  Refused to lie down and spit blood over everyone.  Of course, there was no one there that he knew and he didn’t know a lot of English.  That would be pretty scary by itself but to wake up with a mouth sore and not really comprehending all that had to be done don’t really blame him. 

 

And the other kids I’d done under sedation earlier in the week , plus several new consultations for kids just too much like these two OR cases … Seems there will never be an end to it.

 

I am sick of taking out teeth on little kids and bigger kids that should never have gotten into such a state of disease.  Sick of taking out all the teeth on a child that should be smiling and happy and beautiful.  Sick of trying to help when the child’s own parents hardly seem to care.  I am tired of seeing children who have been hurt by the neglect of their parents.  Tired of seeing parents give a child a bottle of cola in order to keep the child quiet.  I’m tired of seeing a child who at eleven can’t manage to sit in the chair and have treatment done because he is the victim of poor parenting(or none) or his brain has been damaged by a mother who could not abstain from alcohol while pregnant. 

 

Life just seems so unfair to some kids!

 

I guess if God has put me in a position to do even a small thing to help these little guys I’d better give it my best effort.

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Good article

Jordon linked to this article by Mark Bernsteinon on writing for the web.  It is worth reading.

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Making movies

Well, so far, we have made it through the day.  It has actually been fun.  Out of all the time they spent with us, which has been about 6 1/2 hours, plus the two or so hours they will be with us tomorrow, they will make a 6 minute story.  Incredible amount of work.  And they had to be back in Saskatoon for another story tonight by 6:30 – something about kyaking.  Then they drive back up here tomorrow to go with the kids to school and with me to work. 

Our kids were very good about it all.  At first they were not too keen on the whole thing so they kind of got into it slowly at the beginning.  At church this morning, I was wondering if I had been insane agreeing to this because the kids were balking a bit at the whole thing.  Once we got home, the music thing helped a lot – Christian and Patrick and a friend playing and then Grace and her friend dancing, sort of loosened the kids up as they got familiar with the camera crew.  They even filmed Sara doing her homework – that proves it was done I guess! So the interviews with the kids that came at the end were accepted without too much reluctance.  Christian even got some cool music from one of the crew – the camera guy so that made it pretty OK.

So unless they trash the whole thing – it will air sometime between March and May.  And they will send us a cassette of it so we can show home movies to everyone!

Reality TV at it’s best!!  Autographs will be available 🙂

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En Français!

The fact that a TV crew will be in our home tomorrow has been a good incentive to do some housecleaning.  I have also made our dinner for tomorrow – actually have it all planned out and ready to go.  If I was this organized all the time, I would be exhausted. 

I guess it is a bit normal to be a bit nervous about being part of this documentary.  I hope my French comes across better than the French I have heard some politicians use.  I can certainly keep up with the conversation but just as I sometimes will lose my train of thought in English mid-sentance, I am afraid I will do the same in French.   I am a bit afraid of not being able to even find the right word to express myself in French.  On the other hand – I don’t do too badly for it being a second language learned in adulthood.

Mais ça fait longtemps depuis que j’avais une longue conversation en français. 

Well, I guess if we are suck with our French or are too strange a family, they will just cut out our segment and our moment on screen will never occur.

I think it will be one of those “interesting” days. 


Our reasons for choosing adoption are always a bit hard to explain.  Part of those reasons stem from the fact that we were children of the 60’s.  And we are boomers.  When we were growing up we were immersed in concerns for an overpopulated world and decided not to try and contribute to the overpopulation ourselves. There were children out there with no parents and being idealistic decided that if there was a way, this is how we would expand our family. 

So we stopped having children after three.  But then the third one started praying for a little sister and we thought – lets do it.  Lets adopt.

By that time it was becoming more difficult to find a child to adopt in Canada.  It was hard to go through a long adoption process when home assignments were only a year long.  We realized that if we really wanted to adopt, we would have to consider international adoption.  That was fine with us but we decided that it made more sense to adopt a child internationally from a culture we were already familiar with.  So we began to look in the country where we were working – Zaire.

Zaire didn’t have any “orphan” homes.  Children without parents are generally absorbed into the extended family.  But not all children have extended families and they end up gettting short shrift in life.  So we began to look and just six weeks before we had to leave the country we were blessed – finding the first of the children we have adopted.  It was one of the best decisions we have ever made.

 

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Some good visiting

This afternoon I came home to find all of my biological kids at home.  That was kind of a treat.  Rachelle was up for the day and had her teeth all polished up.  She had to go back to S’toon to be back at work tomorrow morning though so it was a short trip.  She and Leo and I sat and watched “Whale Rider” together after the other kids took off and before she had to leave.  That is a good movie!

This afternoon, I got to introduce Leo and Rachelle to the Bison –  a really great coffee shop.  Some of the best coffee I’ve ever had.  It was fun chatting with the Swiss couple who operate it.  And then we met a young family there – turned out she was the daughter of an old friend, now married with a young son.  She recognised Leo’s voice so re-introduced herself to us.

Those parts of the day were fun.

The morning in the operating room was rather “triste”.  Just sometimes things a person has to do gets to them.  Most of the time I can compartimentalize myself enough not to get disturbed by the work I have to do.  Today was hard.  Maybe I will write about it tomorrow.

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Being a bossy boss

Maybe it is better to be a domineering boss.  That way if I dictated stuff no one would dare question or complain – at least in front of me.  But I’m afraid that just isn’t me.  And because I care but sometimes can’t accomodate everyone – well it wears me down.  So tonight I am tired.  I’m tired because although my staff have known for months about my trip to the Congo, today when I told them that I needed them to take most of their holiday time while I was away I got very negative reactions.  Somehow the thought must not have dawned on them before, although it has always been the rule that they would take their vacations when I did.  So it means that some of their time off may not coincide with school vacations – although 2 and a half weeks of it will.  And no one up till now has informed me of any important dates that they will need to have off. 

Does it not occur to them that if I have no assistants to work with when I get back from the Congo, that I will also have no money to pay them with!!!  But then again, I need them as badly as they need me.  And they could get another job a whole lot easier than I could.  They just wouldn’t have as easy going a boss as either Roger or myself.:-)


Work tomorrow should be fun because…! Tomorrow we are in the Operating Room again.  Two pretty big cases. 

The saddest one is an eleven year old who refuses to get work done “in the chair”.  As a result, he will have 8 to 10 permenant teeth out including three of his four top front teeth.  For some reason mother couldn’t (wouldn’t) come with him and we even had to get a telephone consent.  This involves two people explaining things to the parent over the phone – extra work in a way.  Trying to make sure that the parent understands that her son will be going home with no front teeth and that he will not grow another set.  Hoping she maybe cares enough to get him to brush his teeth from now on.  Realizing that the boy probably thought we would be putting in some dentures at the same time as we were taking out his rotten teeth.  Having to tell him that “no” he would be going home without teeth in the front. 

Pretty hard to make a denture for a growing boy that will last the required 8 years under the guidlines of the authority that pays for his work.

I wonder what chance this kid has in life?

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