Monthly Archives: February 2007

The joy of friends

There is a good feeling that comes from entertaining friends. 

Today, we were in the middle of measurements for the new (hopefully) kitchen.  Sara is getting ready for grad pictures – that means hair.  For her this is a major issue and for any black girl with short, short hair who would like to have long flowing locks for grad, a major part of the preparations.  So a friend offered to do it for her.  This will save Sara a huge chunk of money and she will get what she wants.  These friends of ours live in Wakaw but needing to do some shopping, they drove the hour up here. 

They took off to get their shopping done, we had some things to do and we were all going to get together again around 4 pm. 

Leo and I had one of those rare Saturday afternoon coffee dates.  That was a lot of fun.  We took Zaka with us and he enjoyed one of Aunt Annie’s apple turnovers at the Bison. 

Made it home by 4 and no friends showed up.  At about 6 I began to put supper on the table and they drove up.  Ok – will my dish of cabbage rolls and perogies stretch to feed them – yeah, I think.  And I have bread.  We talk them into staying and lo and behold – in walk Eric, Michelle and Patrick.  Christian showed up a bit earlier in the day.  Now we will be eleven for supper instead of three.  So I pulled out some left over rice and curry leftovers and cut the bread.  It stretched just the right amount and we all had plenty.

It is good to have friends that are friends enough to do this kind of impromptu, no fuss kind of entertaining. 

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Reposted

Still having problems with split posts.  I have reposted the last two in just one part, so if you were wondering what I was talking about you can now read them in their entirety.

 

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Snowing

Woke up this morning to news about the incredible snowfall in England.  So I popped over to Toni’s blog to see what he had to say. 

AHH.  He has pictures.

He rode his bike!!!  Broke the chain a few times.  Still that may have been easier than driving by the looks of the roads on the news.

Just as snow is unusual for England, we would be in a bad situation if we didn’t get it here.  It would mean something was seriously wrong in our climate world and we would fear for the dryness of the summer.

Then the news again catches my ear – one and a half meters of snow in New York State.  That would take some diffing to get out of.  I would definately stay home.  Of course I have a four wheel drive and I might be tempted to do something stupid like try.

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Women and Spirituality 2

I guess that when one publishes something as part 1 there is an obligation to continue on to part 2, and so on.  I am not sure how many “and so ons” there will be but here goes part 2.

 

The quote I ended with in my first post on this, if taken on its own, may come across as rather arrogant and belligerent.  I don’t think that it was made in that frame of mind – that is my understanding from reading Sr. Joan Chittister’s book, Called to Question, and some of her other writings. 

 

The statement is forceful but one that both women and men need to understand.  I believe it is a statement about the worth of the person, regardless of gender.  And I believe that God calls us to the sort of wholeness that does not allow us to use others or to be used by others in ways that diminish our real value as bearers of his image.  

 

 believe that my highest calling in life is to serve God.  I don’t think that this is any different for males or females.  In this we are equal before God and equally created in God’s image.  That said, I also believe that God calls us as individuals to a whole assortment of tasks to carry out the work of his kingdom and requires us to be faithful to our calling.  I believe that the calling of God on our lives supersedes any limitation our culture wishes to place on us due to gender, race or social standing. 

 

Sr. Joan states this as, “I was not born to wash a man’s socks.  He was not born to make my decisions.”  I also do not believe that the highest calling of a woman is to serve men in these ways.

 

I think that we see this played out in the story of Jesus’ visit to the home of Mary and Martha.  Martha is doing exactly what her culture demands of a good woman.  She is rushing around in the kitchen getting together a meal and criticizes Mary for not living up to meeting those same expectations.  A woman in that culture should not be sitting at the Teacher’s feet listening while there is work to be done in the kitchen.  Jesus states that Mary, by choosing to be a disciple, to listen and learn at his feet, has chosen the better way.  She wasn’t following the cultural norms, but then Jesus lets us know on numerous occasions that his ways are counter-cultural.

 

In much the same way as Martha I think the church culture expects women to behave in certain ways in order to be classed as “Godly women.”    I know they do this because they do not want to misinterpret  the laws they see set down throughout history, interpreting the patriarchal systems as orders set in place by God rather than a broken order set in place by our sinful nature. 

 

When people hear women say that they were not created to “wash a man’s socks” care needs to be taken to listen carefully.  I believe that one can say that and still wash the socks without worrying that one is giving up some sort of status as an individual of value. 

In our house we both “wash the socks” , we serve each other in order to make our household run.  We have specific tasks that one of us will do better than the other.  They do not always fit the gender stereotypes.

 

Choosing to serve another freely out of a sense of responsibility, out of love and concern, is to serve as Christ taught us.  And regardless of our gender, we will only be truly happy when we do this and allow each other the freedom to respond to the work God calls us to without throwing up gender barriers.

  

 

I guess that when one publishes something as part 1 there is an obligation to continue on to part 2, and so on.  I am not sure how many “and so ons” there will be but here goes part 2.

 

The quote I ended with in my first post on this, if taken on its own, may come across as rather arrogant and belligerent.  I don’t think that it was made in that frame of mind – that is my understanding from reading Sr. Joan Chittister’s book, Called to Question, and some of her other writings. 

 

The statement is forceful but one that both women and men need to understand.  I believe it is a statement about the worth of the person, regardless of gender.  And I believe that God calls us to the sort of wholeness that does not allow us to use others or to be used by others in ways that diminish our real value as bearers of his image.    

 

I believe that my highest calling in life is to serve God.  I don’t think that this is any different for males or females.  In this we are equal before God and equally created in God’s image.  That said, I also believe that God calls us as individuals to a whole assortment of tasks to carry out the work of his kingdom and requires us to be faithful to our calling.  I believe that the calling of God on our lives supersedes any limitation our culture wishes to place on us due to gender, race or social standing. 

 

Sr. Joan states this as, “I was not born to wash a man’s socks.  He was not born to make my decisions.”  I also do not believe that the highest calling of a woman is to serve men in these ways.

 

I think that we see this played out in the story of Jesus’ visit to the home of Mary and Martha.  Martha is doing exactly what her culture demands of a good woman.  She is rushing around in the kitchen getting together a meal and criticizes Mary for not living up to meeting those same expectations.  A woman in that culture should not be sitting at the Teacher’s feet listening while there is work to be done in the kitchen.  Jesus states that Mary, by choosing to be a disciple, to listen and learn at his feet, has chosen the better way.  She wasn’t following the cultural norms, but then Jesus lets us know on numerous occasions that his ways are counter-cultural.

 

In much the same way as Martha I think the church culture expects women to behave in certain ways in order to be classed as “Godly women.”    I know they do this because they do not want to misinterpret  the laws they see set down throughout history, interpreting the patriarchal systems as orders set in place by God rather than a broken order set in place by our sinful nature. 

 

When people hear women say that they were not created to “wash a man’s socks” care needs to be taken to listen carefully.  I believe that one can say that and still wash the socks without worrying that one is giving up some sort of status as an individual of value. 

In our house we both “wash the socks” , we serve each other in order to make our household run.  We have specific tasks that one of us will do better than the other.  They do not always fit the gender stereotypes.

 

Choosing to serve another freely out of a sense of responsibility, out of love and concern, is to serve as Christ taught us.  And regardless of our gender, we will only be truly happy when we do this and allow each other the freedom to respond to the work God calls us to without throwing up gender barriers.

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Living at a different pace

I have red and yellow eyes.  They do not hurt but the colour is almost enough to scare an innocent onlooker.  

 

So, I am a little self –conscious about looking people straight in the face these days.  It is bad when strange little children look at you and cry – well that hasn’t exactly happened.  In fact the little ones I am around the most have not mentioned it.  So that is comforting. 

 

This morning I had to take Grace’s car in to the shop though and the owner, being a patient of mine, wondered what happened to me.  It looks like Leo may have clobbered me in both eyes – if they didn’t know Leo, I look a bit battered.  So I have been doing a lot of explaining today – the guy at the shop, the guy who came to give me an estimate on kitchen renovations, the waitress.  The people in the stores just kind of look.  Gives them food for thought!

 

Today I set up the appointment to get the stitches out.  I an thinking that by next week I will be almost back to normal.

 

There is something restful about a forced break like this.  I am not “sick” as such.  Since Sunday, I have been feeling quite comfortable.  My babysitting duties are also over now so I can do some of those things I was saving up to do this week – the one that is now quickly coming to the half way mark.  I haven’t done half the things I planned but then I can tell myself I am sick.  So very little quilt.    Living at a different pace.  Its good.  I could get used to this.  

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Women and Spirituality 1

Maybe it is time for me to do a post about women and spirituality. 

 

I have been following with great interest the conversations on women and ministry over at Jesus Creed and Emerging Women.  I realized these are issues I have dealt with in my life, sometimes gaining wisdom, sometimes still struggling with issues.  I feel a bit frustrated that young women lack older women mentors who have enough freedom and guts to forge a path through these issues; a path that above all else seeks God’s way.

 

A lot of what follows is personal opinion, derived over time experiencing life as a woman who has been called by God first of all to faith, to service as a missionary and as a leader in the congregation I am a part of now.  I guess it could be developed into a paper on the subject but there are women better equipped than I am to write academic papers on this.  These are just matters that I am exploring as I live them out.  I guess you who read this get to help me think.  Or simply let me rant.

Maybe it is time for me to do a post about women and spirituality. 

 

I have been following with great interest the conversations on women and ministry over at Jesus Creed and Emerging Women.  I realized these are issues I have dealt with in my life, sometimes gaining wisdom, sometimes still struggling with issues.  I
feel a bit frustrated that young women lack older women mentors who
have enough freedom and guts to forge a path through these issues; a
path that above all else seeks God’s way.

 

A
lot of what follows is personal opinion, derived over time experiencing
life as a woman who has been called by God first of all to faith, to
service as a missionary and as a leader in the congregation I am a part
of now.  I guess it could be developed into a
paper on the subject but there are women better equipped than I am to
write academic papers on this.  These are just matters that I am exploring as I live them out.  I guess you who read this get to help me think.  Or simply let me rant.

 

The term “feminist” frightens a lot of people.  I have lived with it for a long time.  When I was a young adult in the late 60’s, it had so many negative connotations that I shied away from its use.  Now I am more apt to use the term to describe my way of looking at the world.  The term “womanist” might frighten you less.  Whatever these terms mean to you, they do not mean “anti-male” to me.  I
have a lot to thank my husband for in helping me appreciate my value as
a person, letting me come to terms with who I am and supporting me all
the way.  I think we have a pretty healthy partnership.   And he is not the only male that has helped me accept who I am.  In fact, sometimes opposition forms one faster than support.

 

My personal project for the Spiritual Direction course I am taking is Women and Spirituality.  So far, I have read The Interior Castle by Teresa of Avila, Dance of the Dissident Daughter by Sue Monk Kidd, and Called To Question by Joan Chittister.  I guess it all started when I read Kathleen Fisher’s Women at the Well: Feminist Perspectives on Spiritual Direction this summer. The reading has been enlightening, frightening and encouraging.  It has taught me things about the history of women in the organization of the church.  It
has also opened my ears to the frustrations of women reacting to being
stuffed into “female” pigeonholes in the patriarchal structures that
most of our church organizations are.  In spite of much oppression, women have contributed in huge ways.  They
have had the audacity to listen to God calling them to action rather
than to the voices of those telling them “you are just a woman, you
can’t.”  So Teresa of Avila becomes a Doctor of
the Church and Sr. Joan Chittister becomes a current voice calling the
Catholic Church to question on its sexism.  Other
women – Mother Teresa, Dorothy Day, Florence Nightingale, and the list
goes on back in history, have lived out exemplary lives by responding
to the call of God.  I have even known some – Vanette Thorsell and Melvina Benson who lived fully as women with a calling from God. 

 

What
I have learned so far is that women have always played a central role
in Christianity and, even before that, God used women to bring his
message to the world; Sarah, Miriam, Hannah, Ruth, Rahab, etc.  There were judges and prophets, mothers and queens.  Their stories are not always elaborated on their own but are intertwined with those of men.  Throughout history, God’s redeeming work has been worked out through the lives of women.  We just don’t often think about their roles.  All the great male heroes of the Bible had mothers, sisters, lovers that influenced their ability to hear God and respond.  Women were not the writers so their stories are not always complete, they were however present and active. 

 

Then came Jesus.  The Son of God, certainly.  Also the son of Mary. 

 

Jesus seems to have a whole new way of relating to women.  They
follow him, provide for his needs, listen and learn at his feet – a
place normally reserved in that culture for male students.  He speaks to them, heals them and cares about the injustices they are forced to endure.  And the women, of no account politically, can follow unhindered to the execution site when the men scatter.  Women often rank among the oppressed – not a bad place to be in the upside down kingdom of Jesus.

 

The early church seems to follow Jesus’ lead with women taking a significant place in the churches activities.  Again we see prophets, mothers, business women and trades people; women of influence active in the early church.

 

Presently,
as women recognise their value as persons created in the image of God,
old patriarchal structures are being questioned.  And they should be.  More and more, the secondary position of women is being seen as a result of humankind’s broken relationship with the Creator.  Is God leading us all into a healthier way of being as men and women treat each other with equality?  I
believe it makes sense to take the teachings of Jesus, the examples we
have of how he treated women and extrapolate that he came to redeem
women as well as men; to restore us all to a right relationship with
him and to healthy relationships with each other.

 

Until
we can be fully human together —until we can all come into the
wholeness of ourselves, neither men nor women will be really happy.  Men will go on being threatened, women will go on being half developed.  What kind of world is that?  I was not born to wash a man’s socks.  He was not born to make my decisions.  I want no part of such slavery, not even when you couch it in God-talk.
Joan Chittister, Called to Question (Sheed and Ward 2004), p 148

 

 

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Made it

I am glad to be able to say that the surgery seems to have gone well.  I am a bit sore and swollen.  The vision is a bit blurry from the Erythromycin ointment. 

So all this time and so little reading got done.  We’ll see what tomorrow brings. 

One day at a time.  But I think it is going to go just fine.

Acetomenaphen and ibuprofen are wonderful drugs.

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