Monthly Archives: September 2003

I just finished posting something and just lost it.

Well there I seem to have found it again!  Goodnight!

And again it has disappeared – oh well…

Looking out my window, it is grey with rain.  The seagulls lift off in one huge flock as someone jogs down the path through the park across the street by the river.  Fall is coming quickly.

Our summers pass by with such speed.  I prefer the temperatures and colours that autumn brings but it seems that summer changes into autumn too, too fast.  One forgets quickly the 30 plus degrees of the hot days and nights.  Now there are quilts to be snuggled under and a fire to be lit.  There is a certain cozy pleasure in this.

Living for a time in the tropics where the variation in seasons consisted of a few degrees and a few minutes change in the heat and length of the days created in me a longing for the seasons of the northern hemishere that I grew up with.  I am a person most at home with the changing of the seasons.  Each one brings its own pleasures but it is the period of change between them that I love most.  I am full of anticipation of the next seasons best days that will be mine to enjoy just ahead.

Quickly forgotten are the long hot days when I wished for air conditioning and still far away are the cold dark nights of winter with the bitter cold that numbs to the bone.

So come autumn!  I wait for the calls of  the geese as they gather on the river and fill the evening skies over my home.  I wait for those first crisp days after a nighttime frost when the clear blue sky seems to have a certain sharpness to it.  And I wait for the turning of the greens of summer to the bright golds, oranges and browns of the fall.

My reading has brought me to the last chapters of the Gospel of Matthew.  This morning I was reading the account of the last supper and of Judas’ betrayal.  These are just some thoughts I had:

Judas Betrayal

Why did Judas choose to betray with a kiss? 

Was it some arrogant pride

That  caused him to say,

See, I too am one

Of the inner circle”?

What did he think?

That his subtle approach

To Jesus

Appearing as a friend

Would keep God from running?

Did he want to preserve

His self image

As a nice guy?

As right?

Expecting the Kingdom to come his way?

How did he see God’s ways

With his treasurers mind?

Did he see Jesus’ ways

As too utterly foreign

To usher in the Kingdom?

Was he just a

Regular misguided guy?

Did his heart turn to stone

Before or after

His treacherous act?

Could he have chosen

To repent

Following such a heinous act

Of treachery?

Or, once done, did his act seal his fate forever?

Back to winter hours at church again.  We started the day off with Potluck breakfast and that was fun.  And my grandson made his first visit to church today too.  Annette came with us while my wicked son went golfing.

Randall    spoke about how God uses the difficult experiences of life to deepen our faith.  It was timely for me because I seem to have end to end difficult experiences some days.  And prayer – I learned a bit more about how much God cares in his answer to one of mine.

For most of the afternoon and evening my house was filled with kids. Dave, Annette and Kieran for lunch.  This afternoon, Sara had some of her friends over and they were playing Sims downstairs.  Then tonight Christian and friends were jamming down in his “room”  which looks more and more like a music studio.  I don’t know how many guitars are down there – about 5 plus his drums.  We were rocking.  Makes us appreciate the renovations to our office last winter which give us a moderate amount of sound insulation!

My other half is back home.  It’s funny how we call our spouses the “better” half.  But it is true in my case – at least that’s how I feel.  And I think he’s my better half because when he’s around, I’m better.

We compliment each other.  We’re not much alike at all.  Or maybe it would be more accurate to say we weren’t very much alike to start with. 

He’s extroverted – I’m not.  But I’m a whole lot more self confident now because he peeled off some of my introverted shell.  Losing part of that shell was painful at first.  He tells people everything.  He wears no masks, so what you see is what you get.  Me – I don’t always want people to know the intimate details, especially the embarassing ones.  He’s learned to be more sensitive – I’ve learned to be more open.   

He has a sense of humor that is earthy, (a nice way to say really bad sometimes) loud, and the way he tells a joke – well, everyone laughs.  Even if they’ve heard the same joke from him before. (which I can guarantee you I have!).  Me – well, you could say I am witty but I can’t tell jokes without killing the punch line.  

He is organized – likes administration.  He likes to run the show, make decisions quickly and get the job done.  Me – well if I can procrastinate a bit longer I will.  It helps to keep me on track just knowing that he will expect me to get some job done. 

He is so unmusical it hurts.  But his musical repetoire includes more than just country now – a whole range from classical to rock.  Just don’t ask him to sing – you will regret it!  Me – I love music – except for country – but I have even learned to listen to that.  And art – well don’t expect him to rave about something abstract.

But we are both suckers for little creatures that need a hand.  And for kids. And for Africa. And for the people who are down and out in this world and need a second chance.

Yeah, my best friend, my better half, my love, is home again.  And I am glad.